


Tea and Cookies

by terezis



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Post-Canon, barry and lup got some explainin' to do, well not really. sort of? a little
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-13
Updated: 2017-07-13
Packaged: 2018-12-01 20:56:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11494596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terezis/pseuds/terezis
Summary: “So.”“So,” Lup agrees, tilting her head. Her eyes narrow a fraction as she eyes Kravitz over, from the scythe he holds in one hand, to his well-tailored suit, all the way back to the arm around her brother’s waist. As the rift behind them closes, Kravitz reluctantly dismisses his weapon, although he immediately misses the security it provides. No tattered black robes today, no menacing skeleton. This isn’t that kind of job; these aren’t his typical marks. Hell, this isn’t even a bounty, if he wants to get technical. This gathering is… a formality. Diplomacy, a sort of peace accords. This is, well. Meeting the family.So Kravitz is a tad nervous.





	Tea and Cookies

**Author's Note:**

> so i wrote this about a month ago, and sat on it until today's episode, and it's still mostly canon? like it COULD be. at the time i imagined lup being freed a bit later in the fight - hence the joke about lup('s umbrella) eating john's magical essence when he's defeated. other than that, though...

There’s a long, uncomfortable silence that follows Taako and Kravitz through a tear in time and space and into the apartment. Well, uncomfortable for Kravitz; Taako waves jauntily at its inhabitants with trademark nonchalance. Taking the shortcut had been his idea, although their destination was only down the hall from Taako's place.

(“What’s the point of dating death if I can’t reap all the bennies that come with?” Taako had said, and Kravitz had quirked a brow.

“Ah, I see. You’ve been using me for my employee benefits this whole time, is that it?”

Taako had rolled his eyes. “Yeah, you caught me, dude. I’m in it for all those good, good perks,” he’d said, and leaned over to peck Kravitz on the lips.) 

After a few seconds – just long enough for it to be supremely awkward – Barry clears his throat. He claps his hands together with a loud smack that Kravitz absolutely does _not_ flinch at. “So.”

“So,” Lup agrees, tilting her head. Her eyes narrow a fraction as she eyes Kravitz over, from the scythe he holds in one hand, to his well-tailored suit, all the way back to the arm around her brother’s waist. As the rift behind them closes, Kravitz reluctantly dismisses his weapon, although he immediately misses the security it provides. No tattered black robes today, no menacing skeleton. This isn’t that kind of job; these aren’t his typical marks. Hell, this isn’t even a bounty, if he wants to get technical. This gathering is… a formality. Diplomacy, a sort of peace accords. This is, well. Meeting the family.

So Kravitz is a tad nervous.         

Still, he tries his best not to blanch under Lup’s scrutiny. It’s hard to tell – she’s wearing an expression like a switchblade, calculating and sharp, and Kravitz isn’t sure what to make of that – but she doesn’t exactly seem _impressed_ by what she’s seeing. Kravitz has seen Taako make this exact face more often than he can count – while critiquing the Bureau's cafeteria food, while goofing on his kid apprentice during their magic lessons. For all Kravitz knows, this is a test. (For all Kravitz knows, she can smell his fear).

“This is the boy-toy, huh?” she says, raising her eyebrows.

“Hells yeah,” Taako drawls. He drapes an arm loosely around Kravitz’s shoulder and squeezes. Kravitz supposes it’s meant to be reassuring – Taako knows how anxious he’d been about this get-together – but if the smirk tugging at the elf’s lips is anything to go by, Kravitz also thinks Taako might be enjoying this too much already.

(Taako had snorted, rolling his eyes and kissing Kravitz’s jaw the day prior. “I’ll be right there with ya, handsome. What’s she gonna do, set your suit on fire? S’not like it’s even real,” he’d said. “You can just think a new one into existence.”

“Regardless,” Kravitz had replied, dry, “I would really prefer no fire be involved at all, if we can help it.” And Taako had laughed.

“No, really,” Kravitz had said, brows knitted. “Is fire something I should be worried about?”)

“So this is the ghost cop who tried to take my brother to ghost jail,” Lup continues, crossing her arms. She leans back against the dark oak table behind her: likely one of Burnsides’ creations, Kravitz thinks. It’s easy to see the touch of Taako’s friends here. Lup and Barry’s residence is a menagerie of other people’s furniture; books stolen from the Bureau’s library, potted plants no doubt gifts from Highchurch. If Kravitz looked around, he’d recognize a fair amount of Taako’s clothing, now Lup’s, hung on chairs and lying in heaps on the couch. 

Lup had invited Taako to bring Kravitz by when she’d first heard he wanted to parley. Kravitz supposes now that it might have been a power play.  Neither she nor Barry have invited them to sit down, but then, Kravitz didn’t really expect this to be a _tea and cookies_ sort of situation.

Lup’s eyes flick up and down once more, dismissive; Kravitz swallows involuntarily. Next to him, Taako tries to stifle a snicker, ducking his head into the crook of Kravitz’s neck.

“Heard you’re not such a big fan of liches over in the astral plane,” she says lightly. “Did you know I used to be one? Lived in an umbrella for a while.” She shrugs. “Little cramped.”

“Ah, yes, well. I’d imagine so,” Kravitz says, and this time Taako doesn’t bother to hide his laughter. Even Barry, who so far has been stone-faced, cracks a wry smile. “That’s, well – you and your coterie, the Bureau of Balance and associates, you all saved our bacon in a bit of a major way. The Raven Queen would like me to convey her gratitude.” 

“I mean, I didn’t do all that much, my dude. I was kind of, you know, _outerwear_ at the time.”

“You _did_ vore the shit out of John what’s-his-face at the end there, Lulu,” Taako adds. Barry snorts; Lup smacks his arm.

“Gross, shut up. I also saved your ass from dying like, five times during that fight alone, _iiif_ you’ll recall,” Lup says.

“Haha, yeah, true.”

Kravitz clears his throat and starts again. “The astral plane owes you all a great deal.”

“All of reality owes us, sugar, what else is new,” Taako says, examining his nails. Kravitz shoots him a look and continues:

“ _As I was saying_ , the entire planar system owes you all far more than they could ever repay, but my Lady would like to extend her blessing regardless. As you know, you’ve been pardoned for your… abnormally high death count.” Kravitz summons his book of light, thankful for the opportunity to look away without losing face. He flips a few pages. “I’ll save you the trouble of rehashing the numbers,” he says. “In addition… you, Lup, and Barry Bluejeans here, well. You’ve dabbled in more than your fair share of necromancy.”

“Oh, yeah, we dabbled, alright,” Lup replies with an easy drawl that mimics Taako’s almost uncannily. Still, when Kravitz looks up again, there’s a tightness around her eyes, a tension in her jaw.

Barry grimaces. “Look, yeah, we may have grown, uh, a dozen bodies or so –“

“Well, I only needed the one,” Lup says, gesturing downwards.

“We did what we had to do,” Barry finishes, taking Lup’s hand in his.

“Yes, well. I’m here to assure you that you have to worry about any bounties being places on your heads for… any of that. As long as you two keep, keep on the straight and narrow when it comes to the rules of life and death from now on –" The book closes with a clap. “Well, the Raven Queen has no beef.”

There’s a beat, a moment of pause, where Kravitz expects – well, he isn’t sure. _Something_. Not gratitude, exactly; he’s been dealing with wayward souls and wanted criminals far too long for that. (Then again, these aren't criminals.) But maybe some joy? Relief? They don’t even seem smug, like those who cheat death often do. He wishes they did. He’d appreciate any sort of reaction that didn’t radiate disapproval at this point, really.  

Barry blinks owlishly, like he’s surprised, and he lets out the breath he had clearly been holding. He turns and smiles at Lup, who for her own part, just raises a brow at Kravitz. “Okay,” she says. “Cool, cool.” She inclines her head. “Is that all?”

Kravitz clears his throat as he dispels his book. He looks down and tries to will his body not to visibly blush, which is an absolutely futile effort. Not that it matters: Kravitz has a feeling they’ll be able to tell either way.

When he looks up again, he glances at Barry, looks to Lup, meets her gaze. She stares back, and watching them both, something just... clicks for Kravitz. This couple. Taako’s friends. His sister, an alien, a heroine in her own right, at home in the place she and her friends fought so hard to save. Kravitz wonders if it’s a familial trait to stare death down unafraid or if that fearlessness is something both twins just so happened to cultivate. At least Barry had seemed nervous earlier; Taako and Lup are a different breed.

Kravitz takes a deep and useless breath. _Well, it’s now or never,_ he thinks.

“Not quite. I’m also here to assure that… Taako is – I care very deeply about your brother, and –“

“Oh, holy shit, what?” Taako says, whipping his head up from his manicure to stare. He’s turning a little red himself. “What is this thing that you’re doing right now. Stop doing it this instant, what.”

Kravitz powers through, a little more forceful. He can _feel_ the color rising warm on his cheeks. “Conflicting loyalties and - and principles aside, I care about Taako, deeply, and I’d – well, I'd never willingly harm him. Or the people he cares about, for that matter. I hope –“

Lup lets out a sudden peal of laughter, high and delighted. Seeing the look on Taako’s face, Barry joins in. It’s such a dramatic shift in the mood that this time Kravitz actually _does_ flinch. Taako only flushes a deeper color, all the way up to the tips of his twitching ears. He reaches over and tries to cover Kravitz’s mouth, which, _rude._ Lup apparently finds this all hilarious, and she laughs even harder for a nice long minute before eventually dissolving into undignified gigglesnorts. Kravitz leans away from Taako’s hands. Well, this isn’t how he’d imagined this going.  

 Lup wipes tears from her eyes. When she smiles at Kravitz, it’s wide and warm and reaches her eyes. Her nose wrinkles in that endearing way Taako’s so often does, and Kravitz finds himself relaxing. Just a bit. She closes the few feet of distance between them. Taako leans against Kravitz and presses his hands to his face so that they cover his eyes; he peeks through his fingers to glare balefully at his sister.

Lup claps a hand on both of their shoulders, and she grins. “Yeah, okay. You’re alright, aren’t you, bone boy? You’re fine.” She glances over at Taako and smirks. “Also, _foine._ Gonna put a ring on it, Taakito?” Kravitz laughs, startled.

“Oh, wow, would you look at the time!” Taako exclaims, throwing his arms up. “I’m almost late for magic with Angus! Whoops! We’d better jet, Krav!” He takes Kravitz by the hand and starts tugging him towards the door.

Kravitz doesn’t budge. “Funny,” he says, looking sidelong at Taako. His mouth curls up at the edges like he’s holding back laughter.  “I think this is the first time you’ve ever wanted to be on time for your lessons with the boy.”

“Oh, my gods. Are you sure you can’t reopen my case? Send me straight to Ghostanamo Bay, I’m turning myself in right now, let’s go.”

“Oh, don’t break his heart like that, Taako,” Barry grins. “The guy came to get your sister’s blessing, he’s old school, that’s all.”

“Yeah, it was sweet,” Lup agrees.

“Don’t you have like, some bounties to hunt? Some tasty, tasty souls to eat?” Taako groans, slumping against Kravitz’s chest like he’s suddenly dead weight. He slides towards the ground until Kravitz has to grab hold of his waist. He pulls Taako upright and close against his chest.

“I do have some paperwork to file, if you’re kicking me out,” he replies. He’s still smiling. His whole body feels warm. “Are we still on for tomorrow?” he asks.

“Yeah, yeah, sure. Six, right? Go on then, be gone with you.”

Kravitz leans down to kiss Taako’s hair, and Taako turns around so they can say goodbye proper. They step back a bit, and the kiss is quick and chaste, just a peck. Still, Barry’s “ _d’aw_ ” gets overshadowed by Lup’s catcalls for them to get a room. Taako flips them both the bird, but he’s smiling when he pulls away. Just a little.

He’s still smiling as Kravitz opens another rift, and when it closes, and after Kravitz has disappeared.

“So,” Lup says, batting her eyelashes. “I get to be your maid of honor, right?”

Taako makes a face as he sits down at the table and puts his feet up on its surface. He huffs, sounding very put-out, and leans back so that his chair is balanced precariously on two legs. He stretches his arms out to examine his hands again, palms facing away; gives the fingers on one a wiggle, this time, like he’s contemplating something.

He glances up at Lup – she’s holding Barry’s hand. It’s kind of nice, he thinks, seeing them together like this again. Happy. He thinks of his date tomorrow and feels it fluttering in his chest, too.

It’s nice.

“Well, _yeah,”_ he says.

Lup laughs.

**Author's Note:**

> kravitz: she's not going to fuck with me, right?  
> taako: oh, no! no, no no, she's DEFINITELY going to fuck with you.
> 
> and then she messed w/ em both


End file.
